knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

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What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops