What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

What did one computer say to the other? 01001111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011 0100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 0100000 01101001 01110011 0100000 01101111 01100010 01110110 01101001 01101111 01110101 01110011

i like my rose red and my diamonds blue your screamin mercy so did ur mom but i killed her to

A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

a guy walks into a bar.. ouch

Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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