What do you call a black fire-fighter? A hero.

What do humans and trees have in common? -If you hit them with an ax multiple times, they fal down

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

A man walks into a bar. He is now passed out on the ground. (TD)

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

What did the man say to the other man? Hi

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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