How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Q: What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A: A pedophile.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

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Flowers are colors Love me

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What do you get if Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus have a baby? The apocalypse

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops