How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

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An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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