Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

Once, a woman told her son to be a peach and fetch some sugar. Little did she know that a genie heard her. The next day, she was horrified to find her son gone and a peach in his bed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

What's did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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