- Anti Joke

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

What did the police officer say to the bank robber? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.

Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

Why did the chicken cross the road So he could get back to the farm and lay more eggs

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.