A man was wacking it and then his internet went down he then cut off his own balls then his internet came back

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

9/11

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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