*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

Wanna hear a riddle? Womens rights

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house..... knock knock! whos there? THE CHICKEN!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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