Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you tell the difference between a politician and a reindeer? A politician is an employee who works under a strict firm of a government department while a reindeer is a large, grazing ungulate in the family Cervidae that is native to subarctic polar regions of North America.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the gay guy walk into a straight bar To find the better looking guys

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops