A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

what do santa clause and a blueberry have in common they both have beards....except the blueberry

Why did Alec cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by an axe.

Why did the mexican cross the street? Because the next lawn to mow was in a different neighborhood

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

Neil is a reterd.

What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

Ms Leong Sux

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

Fine, ladies first.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

There was a man posting an anti-joke... He had no life

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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