Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What's the difference between a cow? Trick question—cows eat carrots!

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops