A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

So a horse walks into a bar. The rancher immediately contacted medical help, and with a little teamwork, the horse was treated and revived.

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

I haven't left my basement in 29 years

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

This isn't funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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