A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

I have cancer. And you're next.

Men's rights

. . I am a whale

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? (Because she was blind and deaf?) No, because she was a woman.

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

A guy at a baseball game....

Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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