Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

How did th-A fridge.

What city likes baseball the most? New York

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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