Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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