What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

White men's rights

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

Knock knock! Who's there? Hitler, time to shower!

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

Why is Dave's baby dead? Because his wife threw it into the path a Big-rig.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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