Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

You do realize that in my home dimension of earth, I am just lying in the sun, typing on the goddamn laptop right? I mean are you retarded OR SOMETHING? I AM THE GODDAMN MORAL MAN! Moral: Honestly though, If I where like running around shouting this, I... Would begin to get slightly worried...

What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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