Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

thumb_up thumb_down +27

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti-jokes are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the Black man cross the road? To get to Pop-Eye's since KFC is too expensive nowadays. HELL-YA

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Dude man, I'm high...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops