You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

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What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Knock Knock Who's There Me

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops