why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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A man with no legs walks into a bar. Just kidding...

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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What happens when Lord Voldemort tries to kill Harry Potter? He is unsuccessful.

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A bar walks into a man

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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