Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

thumb_up thumb_down -20

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why can't Jesus eat M&Ms? Because they weren't invented when he was alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

thumb_up thumb_down -20

In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops