what do call a large massacre of 1000000 people? a tragedy

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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a man with a serious lung diesease was brought into a hospital, through continuous care they were not able to save him and he died the following morning.

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How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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Q. What do you get when you put a Jew and Adolf Hitler in the same room? A. Trouble

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops