How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Sloths

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

Q: Why was little Timmy afraid of clowns? A: The one at his birthday party killed his parents.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

Emily Scarpello...Fat Couch

Caolan and Eamon

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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