Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

If somebody stabs you in the forehead, you are likely to get injured.

Stephen Hawking

One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

Why do i love this website? Because it is funny.

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

I haven't left my basement in 29 years

Women's rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is an animal without a high enough level of intelligence to see the dangers in doing so.

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

there was once a jew

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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