What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's red and can sing? Elmo

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

thumb_up thumb_down +18

guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

thumb_up thumb_down +18

whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's a good joke? Not this one.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops