Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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You know whats worse than an anti-joke? Practically Anything.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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Why did the basketball team from Detroit win the youth championship? Because they had a good coach amd dedicated, hard-working players.

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

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what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? pretty much everything because dead babies aren't a laughing matter

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What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

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why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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