What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

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Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

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Whats brown and drives people around? A cab driver of south asian decent. Finding a job that alligns with their qualifications and experience is not always possible, so they take up menial jobs to survive and provide for their family.

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Your mom showed up at my house last night. I kindly greeted her and asked if I could help her with anything.

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Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

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an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

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Why didn't the blonde get into college? She died in a car crash.

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Why don't meth addicts like food? Because they have not teeth to chew it with.

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Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

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Me: How can you tell if somebody's a Nazi? Friend: How? Me: Their killing people in a ghetto. Friend: My friend was shot in a ghetto. Me: So, does that make him a Jew? Friend: No, he was just killed in a big ass oven.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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