Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

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What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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We found a cure for cancer. Death

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You Know what worse than having 10 Kids? Having Eleven

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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( . Y . )

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

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Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

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why dont you hit a black kid on a bike? its probably your bike.

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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When you nut and slice her fukcing dumb head off fucking dumb BITCH DIES

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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