A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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hey fat ass u want some butter with them rolls?

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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