The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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what do you do when you forget to do your math homework? kill your teacher

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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if i have 2 bananas, and you have 2 bananas, then together we have 4 bananas what are the chances?

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What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

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Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

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What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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