Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

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I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

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how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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Whats the differance between a lawnmower and a sack of dead babies? I dont have a lawnmower in my garage

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What happened when the homosexual man came out of the closet? He was congratulated for winning the hide and seek contest.

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Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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bob saget

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Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

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How do you burn a lot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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