A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

What do you call a black man? A normal human being

What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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