It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

You know you have no friends when you steal someone's ALIAS concept and disrespect what is perhaps the most intellectually satisfying form of humour. [L]

How do you make a miner sad? You cut his d*ck off then feed it to his family.

Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

OSS ARE RED VIOLENTS IS BLUE U BELONG THE ZOO I WILL BE THERE TO BUT LAUGHIN AT U

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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