Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

Paper or plastic? Yes...

What did the man say after jumping into a well? He didn't say anything because he died instantly after jumping head first into a dry, 20 foot well. His family mourned for three days.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

your mama's so fat... that's it

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

the person above me ^ lost his virginity to a howler monkey and the person below me was his gay friend untill he found out about his recent run in with a howler monkey and does not wish the same fait as he does.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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