Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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Proof that the Chicken came first than the Egg is all in the good book. It's called, The Dictionary!

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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David Cameron

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

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why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops