A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

why did the kid burst into flames cause he lit himself on fire

And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

There are 3 prisoners inside a cage. All the prisoners are blind folded and wearing hats. They are told there are 5 hats all together, 2 blue hats and 3 red hats. If one of them can answer what color hat they are wearing they are all set free. However, they have no idea what color hat they are wearing, only what color hat the other prisoners are wearing. They are also not allowed to tell what color the others are wearing. So the game begins: The first prisoner takes off his blind fold. The guard says "What color hat are you wearing?" and the first prisoner says "I don't know." The second prisoner takes off his blind fold. The guard says "What color hat are you wearing?" and the second prisoner says the same thing, "I don't know" Now the third prisoner didn't even need to take off his blind fold. He already knew the answer. He said, "Sir, I know I am wearing a red hat" The guard smiled and all the prisoners are set free. Why? If the first prisoner saw the other prisoners blue hats then he knows he's wearing a red hat because there are only 2 blue hats and 3 red hats. But he sees one guy wearing blue and one guy wearing red, so he says "I don't know." The second prisoner took off his blind fold and the same thoughts occur. If he saw the other prisoners wearing all 2 blue hats, then he knows he's wearing red. Instead, he sees one guy wearing a blue hat and the other guy wearing a red hat. So he says "I don't know" Now the third prisoner doesn't even need to take off his blind fold. Why? He heard the other prisoners saying they don't know, which led him to believe that all they saw was blue and red hats. That means if he takes of his blind fold he will see that both of the previous prisoners will be wearing blue hats and since there are only 2 blue hats available, he must be wearing a red hat.

Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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