Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL Wasted your time didn't I -All the lol post are by me, LOL GUY.

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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