Why can't a T-Rex masturbate? Because dinosaurs have been extinct nearly 65 million years, due to an asteroid collision with the Earth

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Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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your mommas so fat she should be worried about getting diabetes

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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