What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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Yes

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

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what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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there was a black guy and white guy, they were walking down a street to da bus stop, the bus comes by and says where yall goin and they say 21st avenue street; so they walk away and the black guy says(in a black voice): "wait buses dont talk!"

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To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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what makes a knight in shining armor a knight in shining armor? he has to have armor and be a knight.

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Your momma's so fat, when Jesus said, "Let there be light!," she had to scoot over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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