The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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