Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

a white van was driving really slow and he stopped in front 3 children. "do you want some candy" the old man said. the kids took the candy and the old man drove away happily, knowing he made someones day.

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

Mom says my name I reply Coming.

Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

My spelling is horrible

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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