Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

i asked my friend about the holocaust... umm it turns out hes a jew yaaa sorry then i screamed califona fire asin tits then ran

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

NEVER

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

A man walks into a bar. He is promptly taken to the hospital where he finds out that he may have a concussion.

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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