what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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What did rangler get on anti joke? Thumbs down.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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TRICERATOPS!

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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