Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

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What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why is the chicken dead? It tried to cross the road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops