Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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12 in general

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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