Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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Atheism

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What's worse than a real joke on AntiJoke? The Holocaust

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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dallen loves penis

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rose are red so is u want to know why because i shot her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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