You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Q: What did the Mexican say to the other Mexican? A: To get to the other side.

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9-8-7-6-5-4-3-2-1...Kaboom!

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Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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