Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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i've got a little something for you. in fact it's so small you can't see it. it's called spermatazoa

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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Josh Groban, John Mayer, Ben Folds and Nick Cave are at an underground club that specialises in lithuanian folk music and siberian vodka. end of story

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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