If the 49ers won the superbowl

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

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A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Q. Why was little Timmy crying? A. Because his sister died of cancer.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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