A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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This Haiku is strange There is a dinosaur WOW Snuffleupagus

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Jamie stegman liked doodle alot. Yummy he thought to himself as it entered his mouth.

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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A kid is stuck in a fire, his dad (a firefighter) comes and saves him. Sadly the kid needed surgery from the fire. He went to the hospital and when the doctor looked at him he said "I cannot operate on my own son." How can this be? His parents are gay...

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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asians have slitted eyes lol

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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everyone dislike the first joke on page one

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Yes 59 10 away from my faverite number....... 49

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops