A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Tunechi

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

What did the orphan do on Mother's Day? He went to the cemetery

Aww, I knew you where a sweetheart at the core Nerochan, I mean I look up towards people that don't give a jack about what others think but I am not as good at it as you are. Now can you please spam that away like really quickly now?

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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