How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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i am writing this because i felt like it.

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Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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knock knock who's there? your mom your mom who? I'm sorry to tell your mom is dead :.(

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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where's mom I killed her

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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What happened to the fish? It drowned

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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alert('The Game')

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops